Romance Yourself: 5 Dates To Take Yourself on Tonight
Day 10 of #SelfCareSeptember
Ahhhh, romance! Admit it, you love it! It’s cool…there is no shame in wanting to experience the magic of amour. As a 24 year old female, I pretty much only know people on each extreme of the relationship spectrum. My friends are either engaged and blissfully planning their nuptials, or so single that they have forgotten what dating is and simply succumb to our generation’s version of courtship (a.k.a. Netflix and chill).
As loving and as sexual beings, we naturally crave tender care from a partner. However, through media sources like the enchanting tales of our childhood spun by Disney, and even present reality television sensations like “The Bachelor”, there has been an unbalanced importance impressed upon us that we must receive all of our pampering and adoration from outside sources. Further, we encouraged to believe that if we aren’t being completely worshipped by someone, then we must not be worthy, lovable, or deserving, right? Wrong. Equally important to note: just as much as we desire to be loved and cherished by another, we also seek to give the love and devotion welling up inside of us.
Can you see where I’m going with this?
Let’s put two and two together…a person seeking to be cherished also has love and affection to spare…hmmm. How about sending a little bit of that our own way?! Dating and romancing yourself is one of my favorite ways to practice self care. Whether you are single, dating, or in a committed relationship, the way you treat yourself sets the tone for the kind of treatment you expect and accept from others. I believe that it is said best in one of my favorite books, The Perks of Being a Wallflower, when the author states: “We accept the love we think we deserve.” If treat ourselves like we are only deserving of what I call “crumbs of love”, we will never see ourselves as worthy of the whole cookie—and will continue to accept crumbs our whole lives from those we devote ourselves to.
To help you begin to woo yourself properly, I have created a list of 5 dates to take yourself on that are…how you say? Très romantique!
1. Bon Appétit!
Rather than cooking a delicious, gourmet meal for a partner or lover, make one for yourself! Indulge in a more decadent array of delicacies than you might normally allow yourself to enjoy. If you aren’t looking for something fancy, simply prepare yourself a smorgasbord of all of your favorites—be it pigs in a blanket or lobster tails! Turn the whole preparation into an act of love by taking extra time and care with every step, from purchase your ingredients to setting a candlelit table.
2. A Grand Old Time at the Talkies
Just kidding, we aren’t living in the 1930’s. But seriously, take yourself out to see a movie you’ve been dying to see, but have been unable to wrangle your friends into viewing. So what if you want to see the latest Pixar film as a grown adult? You do you, baby boo. Buy yourself the biggest popcorn known to man, sit back, relax, and enjoy the show! No one is there to judge you if you ugly cry or snort when you laugh.
3. Try Your Hand at Something New
Is there is something you’ve always wanted to learn, but never made time to try? Well tonight is the night! Whether it’s painting, pottery, ballroom dance, cooking, DJing, knitting, or pole dancing (you heard me), enroll in a class one evening and give it a go! Chances are, everyone there will be a stranger to you (that you will likely never see again, I might add) so who cares if you look a fool or aren’t a master the first time? Better yet, you might even make new friends!
4. A Romantic Getaway—for one!
Although this idea is a little on the pricier side, it is something you can give yourself to look forward to and save up for. Whisk yourself away for a weekend, or even just a single night, at a hotel, resort, or spa near you. Drive someplace beautiful within a few hours of you and let yourself hike and explore by day, and pamper yourself in the evenings. Not into nature? No problem. Try (window) shopping ’til you drop and splurge on a spa treatment! Getting a change of scenery and treating yourself to a staycation is a great way to say “I love you, self!”
5. Take a Stroll
For something simple, yet profound, take yourself on a stroll through a park, near a body of water, or even just around your town or neighborhood. Pick your favorite time of day—sunrise, sunset, under a starry night sky—and allow yourself to look at the world with enchantment and wonder. Take your iPod and play some romantic tunes as you saunter along and fall in love with the place you are in.
You are one hot date! As you begin to view and treat yourself as such, you will automatically begin to shift your energy to attract that into your life from someone else. The good news is, by the time they roll around you won’t need them, you will just get to enjoy and love them!
“My heart is open to giving and receiving romantic love and gestures. I am a romantic and sexual being, worthy of affection, love, attention and care. I cherish and adore myself first, so that I may give that freely to others.”